"The One"

  All our lives we have heard people speak of "The One."   When we were younger, hearing someone speak of "The One" made questions arise within us such as, "Who is "The One" they're speaking of?"  "How do you find "The One?" "Why do they call that person "The One?"  "When will I find "The One?"  These are the same questions many of us continue asking and continue trying to seek the answers to in our adult lives.  Everyone has their own interpretation of what "The One" means to them and their own definition of it.  I will be discussing MY interpretation and definition, both of which I have discovered through my own personal experiences and beliefs.

  Now, let's start off with the first question, "Who is "The One" they're speaking of?"  I believe "The One" to be the love of one's life.  Many people spend their whole lives searching for "The One" because out there, in this vast universe, EVERYONE has that ONE person that is meant for them.  It's like that old saying goes, "There's someone for everyone."  I believe this to be true.  We may never find this person or we may settle for someone who is less than because we give up hope on finding "The One."  As humans, we all expect things to "happen" to us/for us but what we fail to realize and SEE is that the only way things are going to "happen" is if WE put in the footwork and not only open our eyes but also our hearts.  "The One" is different and unique for everyone.  What YOU love and see in "The One" who is meant for you, others may not love or even understand.  But, if YOU truly love the person that is deemed "The One" for you, it won't matter to you what anyone thinks.

  When I think about or speak of "The One", I can't help but associate the word soulmate.  By definition, the word soulmate means: "a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity, similarity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, and compatibility. A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul, which is thought to be the ultimate soulmate. In New Age spirituality, the ultimate soulmate is The One and only other half of one's soul." (excerpt taken from Wikipedia)  I define a soulmate as someone who nurtures your soul, which in turn helps to promote insight and growth.  Genuine happiness can only come when you stimulate your core self (a.k.a your soul) and grow into your highest potential.  When you feel a deep, unexplainable yet indestructible connection with someone and that same person challenges you and inspires you to grow to your fullest potential, you've found your soulmate.  As you can clearly see (and if you don't see that yet, hopefully you will by the end of this), the same holds true when referring to "The One."

  "The One" is not only your soulmate but also your best friend.  In my opinion, the best and most successful relationships are those in which the couple are not just lovers but also each other's best friend.  When I think of a best friend (in a partner/mate) I feel that it is someone you can FULLY trust, 100% of the time.  When I say that, I'm alluding to the level of trust where you trust that person with your life and everything in it.  It's someone you have an unspoken bond with and despite how long you've known each other, you feel as though you've known them your entire life. They bring out the absolute BEST in you and you have the desire to be a better person because of that.  You have a profound feeling of comfortableness and feeling safe with them and because of that, you let them see your TRUE SELF without reservation because you know they will NOT judge you or make you feel embarrassed, shameful, silly, or inadequate.  They understand you completely about anything and everything and are always patient with you.  It's someone that you can turn to with whatever the situation may be and KNOW they will be there no matter what.  When you need them they are ready, willing, and able, no questions asked.  It's someone you can confide in openly and divulge your deepest, darkest secrets to that no one, other then you and God know, and have confidence in that person to hold your secrets safe.  It's someone that lifts you up and supports you.  When I say "lifts you up and supports you" I'm not talking about physically lifting you up and financially supporting you.  What I mean by "lifts you up" is someone that makes you feel incredible about yourself, not in an egotistical kind of way but in a healthy one and gives you added confidence in yourself and your abilities.  And when I say "supports you" I mean someone that encourages you to do the things you want and makes you feel like there's nothing you CAN'T do.  Let's say, for example, you decide you want to go back to school or write a book, your best friend will encourage you to do so and back you up on that decision 100%.  Like your own personal cheerleader in life.  Don't misunderstand me though because this same person that will encourage you to do whatever makes you happy, will also be the voice of reason when it's something that may negatively affect you or have a negative outcome.  And that's what makes this person your BEST friend.  You don't want someone always agreeing with everything you say or do, especially if what your saying and doing are wrong.  Your best friend will always be honest with you, even if sometimes you don't want to hear it.  "And why is that?", you ask.  It's because your best friend genuinely cares about you and your well being.  When you find the person that fits the characteristics and traits I just mentioned (with regards to a soulmate and a best friend), hold on to them as tight as you can and never let go.

  Now, the next question is probably the MOST asked whose answer is the MOST sought after,  "How do you find "The One?"  I want you to sit for a minute and think about what your answer is to this question.  There are many different answers to this one, some are right and some are wrong.  In my opinion, it all depends on your ability to SEE.  I know, you're sitting there reading this and thinking to yourself, "This girl is crazy, of course I can see!"  but hear me out on this.  Earlier in this post, I was talking about what a soulmate is and what a best friend is and when you combine ALL of the qualities, characteristics and traits of those two things, you know you have found "The One."  Now I know you're STILL sitting there, more puzzled then before you started reading this and wondering to yourself, "Yea we read that Lisa, now tell us HOW we find this person!"  You need to stop trying to find the person you have created in your mind.  Ok, I'll explain this because I can see that bewildered look on your face.  Everyone has a mental "list" or set of "standards" that they require or want in the man or woman of their dreams.  You know what I mean, so don't pretend you don't!  Let's say, for example, a typical woman's list would look like this:
1.  Tall, Dark, Handsome <---Or whatever your personal preference is with regards to physical appearance.
2.  Nice, Smart, Funny, etc <---- Another attribute of your preference.
3.  Financially stable/Rich/Wealthy <---- Obviously most woman don't hope and dream the man of her dreams is poor.
4.  Successful career <---- Once again, most women don't sit around hoping that the man of their dreams is a garbage man (this profession was selected purely as an example and was not meant to offend or upset anyone reading this) or any other kind of physical/manual labor position.  They usually hope the man of their dreams is a doctor or lawyer or something profound like that.
5.  Great in bed <---- Yea, I said it girls!  We all know that even women prefer a man that is great in bed and knows how to and is willing to please his woman.  Some women even stay in relationships with men they know aren't "The One" for them, purely because they are "in lust" and are basically addicted to the sexual aspect of the relationship.  If you are one of these women, GET OUT OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP NOW!!  Don't ask questions, you'll thank me in the long run.
Now, let's take a look at an example of a typical man's list:
1.  Tall/Thin/Blond <---- Or whatever your personal preference is regarding physical appearance.
2.  Hot body <---- Another personal preference regarding physical appearance.
3.  Nice butt/legs/big boobs <----- Once again, another personal preference regarding physical appearance.
4.  Not a gold-digger <---- It seems like men today are more aware of women that are with them solely based on the fact that they have money and if they detect this, will most likely want out of the relationship OR will make you sign a pre-nuptual agreement, should he decide to make that long-term commitment with you.
5.  Not a whore <------ I think it's safe to say that every man wants a woman that hasn't slept with half the male population on Earth.  Most men like to think or believe their wives are pure and that they didn't partake in any promiscuous activity prior to marrying them.  (Even though most men are whores and have probably slept with a large number of women throughout their lives, a.k.a double standards)
 I could go on and on about what men and women typically think about and look for when they're searching for "The One."  But what you fail to realize is NONE of those things represent anything I discussed earlier!!  You, my friend, are searching for your "sold-mate."  Again, with that perplexed look on your face, don't worry, I'll explain what that means soon!!  You see, all of those things I rattled off that are typically on a person's "list" are 
ALL superficial things.  And sadly enough, these are the initial things people look for when trying to find "The One."  Now, I know you're shaking your head in disagreement but let's be realistic for a moment,  EVERYONE sees a person's outside, physical appearance first and that starts the process of evaluation.  If you find a person physically appealing, then you start becoming attracted to them and you want to start getting to know them.  I'll give you an example: if a woman notices a man that is dressed nicely, let's say in a suit and tie for arguments sake, groomed and handsome and this man is looking at her with a smile, she almost immediately wants to get to know him.  The same goes for men so settle down girls!  It's human nature.  So the two meet, have instant chemistry and before long he takes her out on a few dates.  A fancy, expensive restaurant, a show, maybe he buys her gifts, whatever the case may be but most likely it's something like that because this man is trying to impress her and possibly win her over.  She finds out on these dates that not only is there a steamy chemistry between them but he's got a great job and is up for some kind of big promotion soon, he drives a Mercedes or BMW, he comes from a good family and eventually he IS looking to settle down and start his own family one day.   Now, let's flash forward to a year from now.  The woman that chose this attractive man as "The One" (or the man that chose the attractive woman if that's the scenario you prefer!) has now had the time to SEE this person.  Don't be fooled into thinking just because someone is attractive and there's a good chemistry between you, that they are "The One" for you.  Now let's go back to the example: in that year, the woman has caught this wonderful (or so she originally thought), attractive man in a lie or found out that he has cheated on her.  Or maybe she started seeing other things that she "over-looked" before or, if we're going to be totally honest, turned a blind eye to.  And why did she "over-look" these things?  The answer is simple really,  because he is "good on paper."  He's handsome, they're attracted to each other, he has a great job, is financially set and is great in bed.  The initial physical attraction/chemistry fooled her into thinking that this man was "The One" because she didn't take the time to see past the "superficial lures." (the superficial lures being the things I mentioned earlier on the "list")   She also fooled herself on the date where they got to talking about things they want in life and she heard him say he does want "to settle down and start his own family one day."  Most women will focus on that last part because ultimately, that's what everyone's (especially women's) primary goal is:  To settle down and start a family.  Most people will stay with their "sold-mate" simply because they are afraid of being alone, they feel time is running out/has run out because of their age or more commonly because they're comfortable with that person.  When I used the term "sold-mate" in the beginning of this section, it was because when you have a "list" like the examples I gave before and stay with the person that matches that list as opposed to the descriptions I gave for what I believe "The One" to be like, you have basically sold your soul just to have a mate. These are the people my heart goes out to.  They are missing out on the best thing this life has to offer; LOVE.  I mean REAL, genuine, UNCONDITIONAL, pure, TRUE love.  If you have that kind of love in your life, everything else seems better.  People that are really in LOVE, who have really found "The One" lead happier lives, have better health and just have a better outlook on life because they found that one person that is willing and WANTING to walk with them through it and the stress or anxiety of TRYING to find them is no longer there.  You have to look past the physical and superficial and look INSIDE a person before you decide you want to commit the rest of your life with them.  I've always believed that a person's eyes are the gateway to their soul and that you could tell a lot about them simply by looking into their eyes.  If you doubt this theory or even if you're just curious, give it a shot!  The next time you're with your significant other, friend, colleague, boss, anyone really, REALLY look into their eyes when you talk to them.  You can see if a person is truly genuine and their intentions are pure when you look in their eyes.  You can also tell if everything they're saying is an act and that behind the facade there is a cold-hearted, bitter person.  Going back to the original question and my original answer, you need to SEE people for what and who they REALLY are and not what you imagine them to be or what they initially present themselves to be.  You need to see if they possess the qualities, traits and characteristics of the things I discussed at the beginning of this.  You need to really take your time when getting to know someone before you decide to label them "The One" for you because it takes time for people to show who they truly are inside and what kind of soul they really have.  You have to lay a solid foundation built on TRUST, HONESTY and RESPECT and you also have to form a strong friendship with this person.  Now, I know after reading all that and trying to digest it all, you're thinking to yourself, "Ok, this girl is lying through her teeth about all this."  But I can assure you, I'M NOT!  I never said that looks DON'T matter.  I never said that chemistry doesn't matter.  I never said that money doesn't matter.  I simply said that they shouldn't be the first things you look for when trying to find "The One."  When you find "The One," their physical appearance won't matter because they will be beautiful on the inside (which is what you should want and what is truly imperative), which will project outwardly therefore making them beautiful (or handsome) on the outside to YOU.  Whether other people approve or not that the person you chose as "The One" for you is attractive (in their opinion), shouldn't matter to you because YOUR the one that chose this person, not them.  As long as the two of you are happy with each other, that's all that matters.  When you find "The One," you will have that electric chemistry together because you finally FOUND each other and when that happens, everything just feels NATURAL and RIGHT.  And finally, when you find "The One," money isn't going to be something that will make or break your relationship.  The reason I say that is because no matter what the financial situation is, you will get through it OR enjoy it TOGETHER.  

  The third question we ask (ourselves and others) is, "Why do they call that person"The One"?" and this has a relatively simple answer.  We often refer to this person as "The One" because they are the one that surpassed the rest.  After years of dating, failed relationship after failed relationship, you have finally found that one person who you know in your heart you were meant to be with for the rest of your life.  Some people call "The One" the person that completes them, some people say they found the person that held the key to their heart, the missing piece to the puzzle, etc.  It's all the same really.  Either way you look at it or say it, it's the person you finally feel "at home" with.  And if you are looking at what I just said and don't know what "at home" means, it's ok because I'm going to tell you!!  To say that we feel "at home" with someone is a figurative statement that means you feel accepted, comfortable and like you belong with that person.  Hence, "The One!"

  The last and final question that we all ask and inquire the answer to is, "When will I find "The One"?"  This is the hardest question to answer because, to be honest, there IS no right answer.  I have some tips on increasing your chances or possibly even speeding up the process for you that I'm going to share.  Before I do that though, I want to reiterate the fact that these are MY thoughts, opinions, beliefs and experiences and what works for one may not work for all, but still it can't hurt to try!  The first thing I recommend is stop looking.  Now, make sure you don't read that wrong.  I said to stop LOOKING not to stop SEEING.  How many of you have heard the stories about the two people that had both given up trying to finding "The One" for them and upon doing so, low and behold they stumbled across each other and after really taking the time to get to know one another, fell in love and got married?  Anyone?  Anyone??  No?  Geez, tough crowd huh!  Ok, how about I use this example: you know when you lose something and you go crazy looking for it and can't find it anywhere and you stop looking for it altogether and the next day you find it?  Come on, I know you've done that before!!!  I see you smiling, maybe even laughing because you know it's true!!  Well, take that example and apply to what I said before about not looking anymore for "The One." Do you see where I'm going with this?  Sometimes, we search so intently when trying to find "The One" that we make it impossible to find this person.  Sometimes, the person is right there in front of our faces, yet we still can't find them.  But, if we stop, RELAX and focus on something else for awhile, we WILL eventually find "The One" we've been looking for.  The reason I wanted to clarify myself when saying "STOP LOOKING but DON'T stop SEEING" is because when you do stop looking you WILL be able to SEE, and a lot more clearly too I might add.  When you stop looking, you take the pressure of finding "The One" off yourself and the men or women you meet.  Without the pressure, you are able to take the time that is imperative to really get to know a person.  You need to TRUST that there IS a person out there that you're meant to be with and that you WILL be with this person when the time is right.  Some things are out of our hands and in the hands of fate, destiny or God.  The sooner you stop LOOKING and ACCEPT that it may be out of your hands, the closer you may be to finding "The One."                                                                                                                      Another thing I suggest is, make sure you love yourself BEFORE you decide to go off and search for "The One."  I say this because if you don't love yourself first, it will be virtually impossible for you to allow someone else to love you AND for YOU to love someone else.  When you love yourself, you radiate a magnetic and positive energy to the people around you.  Before you know it, you will have surrounded yourself with people that are attracted to you for who you are.  That's the most important factor when desiring to find "The One."  You WANT "The One" to know YOU and love YOU, not the image you've created to attract them.  It's the same thing I said earlier about seeing a person's true self.  Eventually, you won't be able to keep up the act anymore and your true self will come out and whoever you are in a relationship with at that time will be so confused as to who you really are, they won't know whether to scratch their watch or wind their butt!  You don't want to go through that and more importantly, you don't want to put someone else through that.   Find out who you are, ACCEPT yourself as you are and LOVE yourself.

  My last piece of advice would be to look at your past relationships.  Really take a good, honest look at them.  Do your best to figure out what went wrong or why things didn't work out.  Not just the things your significant other at that time did (or didn't do) but also the things YOU did (or didn't do).  Sure, your first reaction might be, "He cheated! It's HIS fault!!!"  But take a close look at the events leading up to the cheating and take an even closer look at the things that attracted you to this person.  What kind of person were they when you met?  What kind of person were YOU when you met?  How about the kind of people you both were while you were TOGETHER?  What kind of relationship did you have with this person BEFORE anything bad (cheating, lying, etc) took place? You may be able to see things that you never saw before, now that you have been taken out of that equation.  The crucial key you need to keep in mind is to make sure you answer these questions HONESTLY.  After you have answered these questions, you need to do something that will free you from any EX-cess baggage you may be carrying around, unbeknownst to you.  You need to FORGIVE.  When we hold on to unresolved issues from our past relationships, this becomes known as "baggage" and we tend to carry this baggage unknowingly into our future relationships.  In order to obtain closure and free ourselves from this baggage, we MUST forgive.  You need to forgive your ex for any hurt feelings, pain or anguish they may have caused you during your time together.  And you need to forgive YOURSELF for those same things you may have caused for your ex.  While we're in a forgiving mood, let's take it one step further and APOLOGIZE for hurting each other and causing each other pain.  You don't necessarily have to sit with this person face to face or talk to them on the phone to do this exercise but it would be the most helpful because you will BOTH get closure from it.  If that's something that is just inconceivable to you (seeing or talking to them), you could always type an e-mail or write a letter.  You don't HAVE to send the e-mail or letter but it's good to get those negative thoughts and feelings out of your mind and heart, forgive the person and apologize for your part so that you don't have to carry that baggage around with you for the rest of your life.  It's a very freeing exercise and it will contribute to not only the wellbeing of yourself but also of your future relationships.  

  I hope by reading this, I helped at least ONE of you.  Finding "The One" can seem like a daunting task, but remember, "All good things come in time and the best things come to those who are patient."  I know in my heart that each and every one of you reading this will find "The One" you are meant to be with and maybe some of you are fortunate enough to have already found that person.  Whatever the case may be, NEVER give up hope.  You never know where or when you will find "The One,"  but you HAVE to keep believing that you WILL find each other when the time is right.  

If there's one thing you take away from all of this, let it be this:

Looks fade, money comes and goes, careers come and go, material possessions come and go and in the end, all you're left with is each other.  

And ask yourself these questions:  Do you want to be left with someone who has a dark soul, that lies, cheats, is cold-hearted, impure and who you can't even really stand now that all the things that once drew you to them are gone? OR Do you want to be left with someone who has a pure soul and loving heart, who genuinely cares about you and who truly enjoys your company because they aren't just your lover, they're also your best friend?  

<3 GOOD LUCK and GOD BLESS! <3

xoxo LISA xoxo

<3 And Don't Forget: You ARE Gorgeous!! <3

  

And The Winner Is....

  Well, as most of you already know, American Idol Season 11 has come to an end.  It was an amazing season, full of laughing, crying and most of all FABULOUS singing.  If  you read my previous post on the 2nd to last episode (And Then There Were 2), then you know that the last 2 standing were Scotty and Lauren.  I was sooo happy that they were the 2 finalists.  It didn't matter which of them won, I was happy for both!


  When Lauren sang her song "Like My Mother Does", I will admit that tears came rushing to my eyes.  It was such a beautiful, touching song.  I truly thought she had it in the bag, especially when she walked off the stage and up to her mother in the audience.  She was hugging her mom and singing and it was just so heartwarming.  Watch Lauren Sing "Like My Mother Does"

  Now, when Scotty sang his song "I Love You This Big", I got goosebumps!  It was such an adorable song and the way he sings can literally melt any girl's heart.  I always loved when he would look directly into the camera while he was singing because it always seemed as if he was singing to YOU (you being the viewer at home).  He has such an incredible stage presence.  So calm and collected yet so confident but not cocky.  I always enjoyed watching his performances.  Watch Scotty Sing "I Love You This Big"

  The Finale episode was jam packed with performances from all kinds of big musicians such as Judas Priest, Tony Bennett, Beyonce,  Lady Gaga, Mark Anthony, TLC and the list goes on.  It was probably one of the best Finales I've seen in American Idol history!  The producers of American Idol really outdid themselves this year, pulling out all the big guns and sparing no expense.


  I really loved when Lauren and Carrie Underwood sang "Before He Cheats" because that is one of my FAVORITE Carrie Underwood songs.  It was sweet because Lauren looks up to Carrie and it must have been such an honor to be able to perform with her.  Check Out Carrie Underwood and Lauren Sing "Before He Cheats"


  Scotty got to sing with Tim McGraw, one of his idols.  They sang "Live Like You Were Dying" and it was truly an amazing performance.  This song that they sang was really beautiful and had powerful words.  Check Out Tim McGraw and Scotty Sing "Live Like You Were Dying"


  In my eyes, this was definitely the closest competition I've seen on American Idol.  I truly believe that ALL of America loved both of the finalists equally.  And we already know how the judges felt about them.  This was such a close call but in the end, I believe the right person was picked to be the winner.  But like all competitions, a winner must be chosen.  Lauren and Scotty stood next to each other, holding hands, waiting to hear who's name was going to be called.  Everyone was on the edge of their seats waiting in anticipation.  And then Ryan Seacrest announces the winner: SCOTTY MCCREERY!  My family and I shrieked with joy that he won!!  We were soo happy for him.  He truly did earn this victory.  And to my surprise, Lauren took losing with grace and maturity.  I kind of thought she was going to be crying because she lost but she was all smiles and gave Scotty such a big hug.  Then there was the "kiss heard round' the world."  When Lauren was giving Scotty a hug she gave him a kiss!!  It was sooo cute because all season long, my parents and I thought they would make such a good couple.  And of course, because of this infamous kiss, all sorts of rumors and controversy was stirred up.  Watch The Winner Get Announced!  Now, what I thought was extremely touching, was what Scotty says when Ryan asks "What does it feel like?"  You can watch that in the link (Watch the Winner Get Announced).


  Now I'm going to be honest.  I NEVER used to like Country music.  Not at all...Not one bit!  BUT after watching this season of American Idol, listening to the songs Scotty and Lauren sang, it really did change my opinion of Country music.  I may not like ALL Country music but I have definitely started to listen to it and have a greater appreciation for it now.  This was such a fantastic season of American Idol.  One I will never forget.  Watching Scotty get brought to tears when he was singing his song at the end was something that plays over and over in my head.  He was soo happy and sooo appreciative that people voted him to be the new American Idol.  Good job America!  So, until next season...remember, I love YOU this BIG!

Question For The Night:  What was your favorite performance of the night on the Finale episode?

As Always, Remember:

YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!!

xoxo Lisa xoxo

Idol...And Then There Were 2...

  In tonight's episode of American Idol, there were 3 left:  Scotty, Lauren and Hailee.  I've been BIG fans of both Scotty and Lauren for some time now but for some reason Hailee rubbed me the wrong way from the very start.  She does have a good voice but sometimes it seems like she's really trying to show off and she always gave me this feeling like somehow she knew she had this WHOLE thing in the bag.


  All 3 contestants got to go back to their hometowns, since they've been gone the past 3 months competing on Idol.  The first one they showed in their hometown was Hailee.  Eh, I wasn't all that impressed.  I mean yea, she had a lot of people rooting for her when she got there and it was nice and all but EH...


  Next, they showed Scotty go back to his hometown.  Talk about needing a box of tissues!!  He is just so damn cute, I wanted to jump through the tv and hug him!!  He got soo overwhelmed with emotion at the amount of people that were there to support him and welcome him back home for the short while he was there.  He went to the grocery store he was working at before his Idol adventure started and it was soo heartwarming.  The people in his town really love him and were soo proud of him for making it to the final 3.  He cried quite a few times (and so did I!) at the outpour of love and support from his hometown fans.  While he was singing "Your Man" for his fans, the song that he sang for his audition in the very beginning, the guy who really sings the song (Josh Turner) came out onto the stage and completely surprises him.  It was soo cute to see Scotty's reaction!!  He's just a good ol' Southern boy and I <3 him!


  Finally they showed Lauren go back to her hometown.  This was also another tearjerking moment because she took a ride through an area that was devastated by the storms that hit the South recently.  It really was heartbreaking to see all the damage that happened as a result of those storms.  My heart broke for all those people that were affected by it.  And I could tell Lauren's heart broke too.  She was very emotional riding through (as was I).  Then she went and met up with this 11 year old boy that saved his baby brother from being killed during the storm.  OMG talk about waterworks!  I was soo teary eyed that I could barely see the screen anymore!!!  The boy pulled his baby brother out from underneath some bricks that fell and then said that he "didn't want anything bad to happen to him."  Aww!!  What a brave little boy!  Then they showed Lauren singing for all her fans and it was such a beautiful thing to watch.  For such a young girl, she really has such an amazing voice and seems like a really genuine person.


  There were performances from Nicole Scherzinger and 50 Cent and there was this group of 3 Italian boys that sang "Oh Sole Mio" (which is one of my fave Italian songs) and they were REALLY awesome!!  They were adorable, especially the one that stood in the middle!  Ow owwww!  He was a hottie!!  Love me a hot Italian man!!  (yet another of my guilty pleasures...but we'll save that for another post..lol)


  When it came down to the elimination, my heart was literally pounding.  I was sooo anxious to know who was going home and who was going to be part of the last 2 for next week.  And of course Ryan Seacrest tricked us by having the 3 of them all stand together, holding hands and then proceeded to say, "We'll find out..after the break."  UGH!  I hate that!!  Just tell us!!!


  They came back from the break and got right into it, THANK GOD!  Scotty was the first one to make it to the finals, with 95million votes!!  Go Scotty!!!!  Then it came down to the 2 girls.  I was literally on the edge of my seat, shaking, praying and in tears because I was still happy for Scotty making it.  All the sudden, Seacrest says "LAUREN!" and I lost it!!!  I was ecstatic to hear her name get called over that other one.  Lauren was soo happy because I have a feeling she thought she was going home and to her surprise, she wasn't!!!  And that other one, Hailee, she looked SHOCKED and none too thrilled to hear that she was the one that got the boot!  HA HA!!!  That's what you get when you think you're better then everyone!!  (Wow, can you tell I really didn't like her? lol)


  I'm soo happy that Scotty and Lauren made it to the finals and either one that wins, I am going to be thrilled for.  They are both amazing singers and truly genuine people and I feel they both deserve it.  Oh hell, it doesn't matter who wins anyway because they'll still get a contract deal with someone after the show's over.  (Think back to Jennifer Hudson...she didn't win and look at her now!) 


  All in all I was VERY pleased with the outcome of tonight's episode.  Lot's of tears, laughs and cheers!  America made the right choice by voting for those 2 to be in the Finale.  Now, may the best one win!!!

Question For The Night:  Who's YOUR favorite Idol?  Past or Present

Stay Blessed and Remember: 

YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!!

xoxo  Lisa  xoxo

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 3, Episode 1 Recap

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 3 - Relive the Family Brawl - Video - Bravo TV Official Site

O M G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That was all I could think to sum up that episode in one word (phrase..lol). I don't think, in alllll of Housewives history season opening episodes, that I EVER saw one as EXPLOSIVE as this!! I was literally glued to the screen sitting on the edge of my seat the whole time!! If I thought the last 2 seasons were crazy because of all the Danielle drama, then I'm in for a big surprise!

Let me take you back...Monday night...9:00pm... (I just felt like Sophia Petrillo from the Golden GIrls.."Picture this..Sicily..1937..." lol If you don't know what the Golden Girls was, then I really am getting old!)

The opening scene is a quick interview with Teresa and she says something about how her and her sister-in-law Melissa don't get along very well. What Teresa should have also thrown in is her own brother (Joe Gorga, who is now on the show) CAN'T STAND HER! In fact, I'm pretty sure he hates her! Then it jumps to a clip of maybe the last 15 minutes or so, at Teresa's brother's son's Christening party (did you get all that? lol which by the way, if you saw it, you're jaw was on the floor like mine was!). Melissa is one of the new housewives and happens to be married to Teresa's brother Joe. Apparently, Teresa and her brother were VERY close as they were growing up. All the way up until her brother married Melissa. From what I was able to gather, Melissa is an attention whore who got jealous that she wasn't asked to be on the show 3 years ago when this cast originally started filming. She is always comparing her family to Teresa's and I'm pretty sure that aside from loving her little family, she's VERY in love with herself! She actually said, "I was taught to be a wife in the kitchen, a lady in public and a whore in the bedroom...Praise Jesus!" LOL Did she just use whore and Jesus in the same breath??!! Yes she did!! In all the interviews that were shown in the episode, Melissa is constantly talking about (and not nicely I might add) Teresa and her husband Joe Guidice. Now, I totally understand that there's A LOT of backstory that we don't know, seeing as how this is family drama that clearly started way before this show did, but something just doesn't add up with everything that Melissa and her husband Joe keep saying. It's kinda confusing because we don't know the whole thing but I'm sure as this season goes on, we'll learn more.

Anyway, it starts at the baby's Christening. Everyone is having a great time...Italian families always throw great parties. Teresa decided to go up to the table her brother and sister-in-law were at and say, "Congratulations" again (apparently she said it at the church as well) and for whatever reason (the reason in my opinion is because there was a lot of alcohol and drinking going on and when some Italians get drunk they act like Gavones, which basically means animals) Melissa looks at her like she's speaking a different language and her brother yells at her to "Walk away" and then says the meanest thing you could ever say to a sibling, "You're garbage!!!" *GASP!* Her brother keeps repeating himself and Teresa asks him why they invited her if they didn't want her there. That's when Melissa's sister, Lyssa, chimes in and says, "It must have been a technicality!" Teresa starts to walk away and that's when HER husband jumps in and starts. Honestly, it's too crazy to ever put into words so I linked the video clip that I'm talking about at the top of this posting!! lol You can thank me later. ;)

On a more calm and less explosive note, they show the Manzo's. Caroline's 2 sons, Albie and Chris, are going to be moving out into an apartment with each other. The family all go to check the apartment out and Caroline starts to cry because now she only has her daughter Lauren left in the house and she realizes that once she goes, that's it, no more kids in the Manzo nest! It was heartwarming to watch and even though I'm not a mom yet, I could imagine what she was feeling. They are such a close-knit family and it reminds me of how my family and I are.

Then they show Jacqueline. She decides to go visit her daughter, Ashley, at work. Ashley started an intern position at Lizzie Grubman's PR Firm, which actually would make sense seeing as how Lizzie is just about as crazy as Ashley is. While Jacqueline was there she got to meet Lizzie and asked her how her daughter was doing so far. Lizzie told her that "she needs to start coming in more." Jacqueline also learns that this isn't a paid internship so she suggests to Ashley that she get another job that pays her so that she can move into the the city (NYC that is) like she wants to. This makes Ashley all upset because God forbid she have to work for anything she gets. She's a brat and really has no respect at all for her mother. All Jacqueline tries to do is give her advice and guidance and Ashley just isn't having it. After Ashley's crying scene in Lizzie's office, Jacqueline and her husband Chris are sitting in a diner waiting for Ashley to get there and as soon as she does, it's on with the waterworks again! She starts telling them why she hasn't been to work on time (it's early, there's a lot of traffic..blah blah blah...) She's soo dramatic and stupid about everything! Can you tell I really am not a fan of Ashley?? Chris makes a deal with her that if she starts to take her internship more seriously and also gets a job that pays her, he will pay for her expenses to commute back and forth to the city every day, that way she can save the money she makes from the paying job and will eventually be able to get this apartment she wants. Jacqueline gets upset that just Chris and Ashley are having the conversation because every time she tries to say something or ask Ashley a question, Ashley just ignores her or cries or says something stupid. This causes Jacqueline to get so frustrated and upset that she ends up leaving the 2 of them in the diner to continue their conversation. Poor Jacqueline!

Oh, I almost forgot about the other new housewife! Kathy! She's Teresa's cousin. Her and her husband Rich have been close with Teresa and Joe for a long time. I'm not sure what to make of Kathy yet. She seems like she might play both sides of the fence (between Teresa and her brother Joe and Melissa). I think she wants the family to stop all the drama that has come between all of them for the past 8 years but in some ways I think she starts some drama herself. She has extremely HUGE eyes! LOL I don't know what made me think of that but maybe that's why I don't remember much about her from the show. I was too fixated on those big eyes she's got!! They're almost scary in a way!

All in all this was an episode I will never, EVER forget! The link above will show you everything you need to know and once you watch it, I can guarantee you that you will be coming back for more!!! Bravo really outdid themselves with these new cast members!! The other season's better step it up now because I have a feeling these housewives (NewJersey) have set the bar for this show. The viewers are going to want to see things like this from ALL of the different casts. I know I do!!

Stay tuned for next week's episode (Monday night, 10pm eastern) and my recap afterwards!

If you need to fill your housewife fix, go to http://www.bravotv.com and read all the blogs from each of this season's housewives. It's all their opinions of the first episode and it's GOOD!

Question for the night: Does anyone have problems with their siblings significant other's, to the point that it's come between you and your sibling?

Till we talk next time dolls: Stay blessed and remember YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!!

xoxo Lisa xoxo

My Guilty Pleasure...(well one of them...)

  So, we alllllll have a guilty pleasure or two (or three or four...ok yea, you get the point!)  and one of mine happens to be "reality" t.v. shows.  I've always been secretly in love with them.  It started way back in the day with the Real World on MTV and has gotten progressively worse over the years since "reality" shows have been becoming more and more popular.  


  As of the past couple years, one of my favorite shows is The Real Housewives.  It doesn't matter what season or what city, I looove it!!  Tonight is the first episode of Season 3 for the Real Housewives of New Jersey!!  This particular cast was one of my favorites out of the entire Housewives clan.  They always have a lot of drama and there's always soo much going on, I love it!!!  I absolutely LOVE their accents, the way they dress and carry themselves...I just love them!!


  This season isn't going to have Danielle (thank the good lord!!), who, if you've watched the previous seasons, was like the season B*tch!  Ugh I couldn't stand her!!!!!!!!  She was always the start of the drama on the show and literally EVERY person on that show had some kind of problem with her.  Last season was priceless, with her going EVERYWHERE with her "bodyguards".  LOL I mean really Danielle, you're not the President, nor are you someone who is uber famous.  Everything she does, did, whatever was for attention and to stir things up. She's what I liked to call, an attention whore.  I'm serious!!  If you've never seen the previous seasons I highly suggest doing so!!  I'm pretty sure if you go on Bravo.com they have the previous season's episodes.


  They are bringing 2 new housewives into this season and from what I've heard and read, it's gonna be CRAZY!!!!  I'm dying to see what this season is going to be about!!!  As long as my Caroline (Manzo) and Teresa (Giudice) are still on, I'm happy.  There's going to be LOTS of drama and fighting, as usual.  Both of the new housewives are related to Teresa and from what I hear, Teresa can't stand one of them!!  I think the reason I love this particular cast is because they're all Italian.  Me and my family are all Italian as well and I think watching them sometimes, ONLY sometimes, reminds me of my family.  They're loud and obnoxious but they all love each other soo much, no matter what happens.  My favorite line that Caroline says is, "We're family.  We're thick as thieves and we'll protect each other till the end, no matter what." That is such a great quote and I like to think the same applies for my family and I.  


  You can watch the Real Housewives of New Jersey on the Bravo network, Monday nights at 10:00 pm (Eastern time).  And don't forget to watch Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen directly after for all the juicy gossip, recaps of what happened on that night's episode and special guests in the clubhouse!!  


  Well, it's getting closer to 9pm and since tonight is the first episode of this season, it's airing at 9pm and is 90minutes long!!!!  (as opposed to the normal 60minute episode)  I'm soo excited and hope everyone tunes in!!!  Check back tomorrow for my take on the episode!!! 

Question for the night:  What's YOUR guilty pleasure?

Stay blessed and remember: YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!!

xoxo Lisa xoxo

Extras:  Check out Teresa Guidice's cookbook:  Skinny Italian

It's an awesome cookbook with delicious recipes and beautiful pictures of Teresa and her family!!  

Check it out:  http://www.amazon.com/Skinny-Italian-Enjoy-Bella-Great/dp/tags-on-product/1401310354 

Accepting & Loving Yourself As You Are...

Mom Who Botoxed 8-Year-Old Under Investigation

The other day when I was indulging in one of many guilty pleasures (the one I'm referring to is watching those Entertainment News shows..hehe) all the sudden a huge story comes on the screen entitled, "Mom Gave 8yr. Old Daughter Botox." Ummmmm, WHAT?!?! I literally had to watch the segment a few times for it to register in my head as something real that happened and still, at this very moment, I am appalled.

As I was watching I heard the mother say that her daughter ASKED her for the Botox! I seriously couldn't help but laugh because, c'mon, what 8 year old ASKS or even knows about Botox?!?!? But apparently the little girl asked her mother for the Botox because, and I'm quoting, "I just, like, don't, like, think wrinkles are nice on little girls." Wow! I guess the whole story behind all this is because the little girl competes in Beauty Pageants and neither the mother nor the daughter (what a shock, she's 8!!) saw anything wrong with it because "other people do things just like it at pageants." LOL Wait, it gets better!!

Watching this story unfold made me reminisce of my childhood. I took myself back to when I was 8 years old. I have such wonderful, warm memories at that age. Spending time with my family, being in school, playing with my toys...etc...Oh wait, I almost forgot! That was the Christmas I asked Santa for Botox!! Duh!! lol yeaaaa not so much!! To me, that is completely inappropriate that an 8 year old is being put through something like Botox and that she even knows and understands what Botox is!

The worst part, as if it could get any worse, is that for whatever reason (and I have a feeling someone better come up with a good one and quick!) the mother was being videotaped injecting the Botox into her daughter's face! And the little girl was saying it hurt and was clearly in pain but that didn't stop good ol' mom from continuing! Ugh just repeating this to you guys and visualizing the pain on her face is making me outraged!! She's 8!! She's a beautiful, precious little girl who has the rest of her teenage and adult life to be worried about her physical appearance, she shouldn't have to start from now.

I truly feel sorry for this little girl. While on the one hand, yes she likes being in these pageants, who wouldn't? They make them seem like they're fun and glamorous so the kids do it but really, if you've ever watched Little Miss Perfect or any of the other shows about kid beauty pageants, you know that it's not as fun as it looks. And sometimes I wonder if it's more fun for some (not all!) of the moms to live vicariously through their daughters. I mean, I hate to bring it up but look what happened to Jonbenet Ramsey! She was GORGEOUS for a child and now where is she? Not here anymore because some crazy psycho took her destiny in his own hands after watching her compete in those pageants for who knows how long and then going to her house and doing awful things to her.

And another thing that bothers me is what kind of message is being sent to those little girls regarding their physical appearance? Most of them wear Flippers (little snap-on false teeth so you can't see that they lost a tooth or two like a normal child), get spray tanned, wear full faces of make-up, being made to eat a lot of candy to up their energy levels and even have to wear a swimsuit!! Why do they need to associate being beautiful with winning and that losing means they weren't pretty enough or talented enough. They are way too young to have to start dealing with that and I can only imagine it getting worse as they get older.

I know that it's cute to watch the little girls all dolled up looking extra fabulous in those pageants and I know that it's awesome to win the big prizes but is it really worth the psychological effect it's going to have on the child in the years to come? I'm not so sure...

I say, Let the kids be kids...All children are beautiful, special and talented in their own way and every parent should acknowledge that and let their child know that (and I'm not saying all parents don't do that already, I'm just sayin). You don't need pageants to prove that your daughter or son is fabulous & gorgeous. If they don't learn when they're young to accept themselves as they are and other's as they are, then they are really going to have a tough time as they get older.

I'm sorry this is soo long and all over the place but this story really gets me going, if you couldn't tell! It's sick and twisted and I'm kinda happy the mother is under investigation (and for damn good reason!). I mean seriously, where did she get this Botox that she was doing it herself at home? Does she really know the long term effects it could have on her daughter? Why have it videotaped and then put on the internet?? Sooo many questions and I'm sure, in a short time my trusty news shows will have some answers. Hopefully everything turns out ok for that family, but I'm not sure that's going to be the case. I hope that little girl knows that she is beautiful as she is. Before her Botox experience. And before the pageants.

Just one last thing to chew on: " You can be sorry for not being perfect, but never, ever be sorry for being yourself."

xoxo Lisa xoxo

Time To Pay It Forward!!!

So last night as I was walking to my kitchen I noticed a small postcard on my dining room table.  At first I walked by and continued on into the kitchen so I could make my late night cup of coffee (yea I know, it's horrible but coffee has literally NO effect on me!).  As I was waiting for my cup to brew, I walked back to the table and picked up the postcard.  What I read really inspired me and made me want to spread the word myself about it.  The postcard was entitled "Stamp Out Hunger" and had a picture of Nick Cannon and a mail carrier named Paula Miller on it.  


Basically, the United States Postal Service and the National Association of Letter Carriers are sponsoring a food drive that is to take place THIS SATURDAY, MAY 14th to help get more food to local food banks nationwide.  The directions are super simple so I'm going to lay it out for you exactly as it's stated on the card:


1.  Bag non-perishable food items (this would include canned goods, cereals, boxes or bags of pasta or anything that doesn't require refrigeration or freezing.  And please make sure that the items you bag are NOT expired!)
2.  Leave the bag at a mailbox for pickup and delivery to a local food bank.


I think this is such a fabulous idea and I had never heard of it prior to reading the postcard.  I know usually when people check their mail, if it's not a bill or something they're expecting to get, it usually gets thrown out as almost ALL junk mail does.  But I wanted to let people know that if you received the same postcard as I did (and I imagine that everyone most likely did since this is a NATIONWIDE food drive) that this IS a legitimate event and you should partake in it.


Think about how bad our economy is and how many families are struggling to make ends meat or better yet, to put meat on their tables.  Every little bit helps so don't think that if you only have 1 or 2 things to donate that it's not worth doing so.  The 1 can of soup you donate or 1 box of cereal will go to a family that truly needs it.  Think about how good it feels to do something good for someone else, regardless if it's a stranger or someone you love and care about.  By participating in this food drive you will have done your good deed for the day, hell I'll even go as far as saying for the month.  And something else that should make you stop and think is the mail carriers that are ALL participating in this and are all going to be picking up bags of food and making extra stops along their route that day.  I think that is amazing and so kind of the mail carriers to volunteer to do this.  


Let's think for a minute.  I'm pretty sure every town or city has a food bank.  And most people have a mode of transportation or can easily get a ride if they asked.  So why aren't we bringing the food ourselves to these food banks??  I'll tell you why and I don't want you to hate me for saying it, but we're kinda lazy!  The way this food drive is set-up, we really don't have to do much except for putting the food in a bag and walking it out to the mailbox!!  Could it get any easier??  Ok, yea it could.  The mail carrier could come in our homes and bag our stuff and walk it out themselves.  (if you could read the sarcasm in those last two sentences then we are going to be great friends!)


The point I'm trying to make is, I think that we should all donate 1 bag of food this Saturday (May 14th)!!!  It's for a great cause and it will make you happy, your local food bank happy and the lucky, deserving family that needs your help happy.

Remember:  The more good you put out, the more good that comes back!!

xoxo  Lisa  xoxo